Good days for you but
NOT for me.
I try to cheer everything.
Cheers my mood. Cheers my day.
Acts cheerful in front of everyone.
But. . deep deep inside my heart. I'm
disappointed enough.
I don't know where should I start to write.
I get my puzzled-feeling, puzzle-minded,puzzle-hearted.
Believe me,noone can feel like what I feel now.
Even though I share it to anyone, you guys will just laugh and think I'm immature,sensitive and stupid.
Well, I got jealous. I got envy.
Not because of "BOYFRIEND" *Well,I'm still single happy ;D*
But.. because of my BESTFRIEND.
Yeah, little bit awkward.
Hft.
14 June 2011-Someone's birthday.
The day I knew wth, the day I realized sth. The day, I was sad enough. The day I got jealous enough and the day I would never FORGET.
Let's us compare about this
someone's birthday and
my birthday.
Where is much precious for you?
On her's birthday you gave her a cute-nice-photo.
On my birthday?
NOTHING.
On her's birthday you gave her a simple-precious-meaningful bracelet.
On my birthday?
NOTHING.
On her's birthday, you keep trying to give her a simple suprise although her's birthday had passed.
On my birthday?
NOTHING.
Ohmyahusajfl, I'm not
wishing about your cute present,precious gudget,chubby dool,nice picture,a big suprise.
NO.Once more, I'm not
HOPING OR WISHING FOR THOSE.
I can understand, she is your close friend, she is your good listener when you got some problems, she helped you when you were in needed, She was so meaningful for you. Such a pretty-creative-nice-smart girl.
I'm just hoping;a simple hope. PLEASE UNDERSTAND MY FEELING AS YOUR BESTFRIEND. You did nothing special on my birthday, NOTHING. Once more,to be honest I'm not wishing for any materials and suprises.NO. Having you in my life is GOOD ENOUGH. But think, there's a big comparation right between me as your bestfriend and HER as your ... sigh. I don't know what should I type.
YES, Maybe I'm too too too selfish.
The funniest thing is I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S ON MY THIS SELFISH MIND.
Am I too selfish? Am I too sensitive? Am I too easy to get jealous? Am I Am I Am I. TOO MEANINGLESS for you?
I don't know.
You keep commenting me.
You keep praising her.
Commenting me,praising her,commenting me,praising her.
YOU KNOW, I'M TIRED ENOUGH.
Sometimes, you make everything is ruined.
I always try to say the truth with you.
But I don't have brave enough.
Please understand my feelings.
Just little bit,can't you?
I am so thankful and appreciate it if you do.
But, one thing that never changed.
I DO LOVE YOU:)
Sorry and Thankyou.
Big love for you,
Velencia :)
